 |
 |
M r . C a d b u r y
Whilst what I really wanted to do is review Thomas' beloved "Amadeus" without actually having to go through with the tedious hassle of watching F. Murray Abraham make an absolute tit of himself for a good couple of hours, I've been barred. Yes, barred. It's a disgrace. It's a bloody disgrace.
Since the dawn of time, it has been Man's inalienable right to slag off F. Murray Abraham by shouting such things as "FAROOK! MURRAY ABRAHAM!" (which is, as we now know, not his real name) and "SALIERI IN NOT-GOOD FILM SHOCKA!", but I've been prohibited from expounding to you - using the full arsenal of wit at my command - the utter monstrosity of this film. It seems that there is someone tugging the strings of the puppet of Marked Accordingly that is, in fact, me - Mr. Cadbury, whilst maintaining that hint of secrecy to ensure that his scheming goes ever unnoticed.
Yes, it may come as a shock to you all. Sit down, take a cup of brain-soothing tea. Sip gently, as I - the whistle-blower - put it to you that Marked Accordingly has always sought a policy of (SNIP! - "Ed")ensuring that you - the Public - receive the (CUT! - "Ed"). Marked Accordingly is just the start and if it continues like this then they will come for your (ENOUGH! - "Ed").
Obviously, F. Murray Abraham has something to do with this evil. Oscar-winning F. Murray Abraham is somehow perverting everything that Marked Accordingly has, until now, stood for - which is the wholesale slandering of F. Murray Abraham. I - as a mere puppet, will do all I can to stop it, or - more likely - deny the entire existence of this conspiracy.
You can count on my word.
|
